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The Art of Connection

by Mario A. Campanaro

The Art of Connection

by Mario A. Campanaro

One of the most important aspects of being a seriously committed actor/artist is our ability, commitment, courage, and heart to intimately connect and communicate with another human being. Now, this may sound like common sense or even something elementary, but the truth is, it’s a real issue we are facing—not just as artists, but as a collective. We are losing our ability to share a piece of who we are, as we are, in the moment, with another. And we’re also losing our capacity to hold space for someone else, to truly witness their authentic experience.

In today's world, real human connection is becoming more and more rare. We don’t require face-to-face connection anymore. Instead, we hide behind our devices. We text, email, Instagram, Facebook, tweet, and Snapchat—rarely do we pick up the phone to talk to someone. And even worse, we ghost each other when things get real and honest. If this triggers you, it’s because you know it’s an issue.

We’ve become more connected to our phones’ cameras than to their original purpose—communication. We’ve chosen the quick, easy way of “one-way” interaction. Why? Because it’s convenient, it’s safe, and it avoids discomfort. We don’t remember what it’s like to just be with someone, to sit across from them, share our lives, and listen without needing to edit or carefully curate our words. We only share what fits into a neat square box, what looks perfect or put-together. Anything less, we hide. We’ve become addicted to presenting a “perfect” image, creating a dangerously unrealistic portrayal of our lives.

We don’t talk about our struggles anymore. We don’t openly share our challenges or the things that weigh heavily on our hearts. We’ve allowed ourselves to shy away from the discomfort of simply being in front of someone else—being human.

This is where the danger lies for the artist: In this world of carefully constructed, impersonal connections, we don’t have to show up as our true selves. We don’t have to really reveal who we are. We don’t need to hold space for others, and in turn, they won’t hold space for us. It’s easy to fall into the trap of accepting trivial, inauthentic interactions because it’s what society has normalized. But for the actor, this is a serious risk. Because all of the ways in which we fail to communicate or reveal ourselves in our daily lives will inevitably show up in our work.

If we play an idea of ourselves in everyday life, we’ll play ideas of the human condition in our performances. If we can’t sit with another person as we are and allow them to do the same, we’ll struggle to have the necessary intimacy in our work. We will weaken that invaluable human muscle—the ability to be vulnerable, to be imperfectly ourselves, and to allow others the space to do the same. The more we fall into the trap of not connecting, the more we diminish our ability to authentically share the complexities of the human experience in our work. We’ll become robotic, filling moments with inauthentic, idealized actions or ideas of what it means to be human in relation to another person.

Plain and simple, we have to continue to exercise our ability to intimately connect and communicate with others. We have to take the risk of sitting in the discomfort of real, authentic interaction. And we must surround ourselves with a community—a tribe—that’s willing to do the same. We need to keep sharing our stories, being vulnerable, and showing up as we truly are. This is what will sustain our art and our humanity.